17 June 2014

Fatherhood

With the recent occurrence of Father's Day I feel compelled to write about Fatherhood. The choice about whether to be married or have a family is left to each individual. Where health and circumstance don't interfere, we make our own decisions on this important matter. My words are an expression of my own belief, my own experience, and I hope they'll be received in that way,


Being a father is the most important thing I've ever done, and my most important responsibility. It's also the most rewarding and enjoyable thing I've done.

For me, marrying and having children was an imperative. I wasn't forced to, though every social and cultural norm of my faith clearly promoted it. Fortunately, I agreed with those norms, and I believe that my personal spiritual growth required that I take these steps.

I've read recent opinions that are critical of the choice to have children, or that at least imply that there is some kind if nobility involved in not doing so. They mention the stresses imposed on marriages by children, or the potential for overpopulation. As a father, I find these arguments utterly uncompelling.

The stresses of life are what drives growth and development. The purpose of this life is to grow and develop, to move past our weaknesses and challenges and become better as a result. We are not here to avoid stress, so to argue that the childless life should be sought for that reason is not persuasive to me. Likewise, the choice to have children should be based on personal circumstance, and not on fears that children will lead to overpopulation in a world with tremendous resources and potential growth and technological advancement. 

Most importantly, children are a source of great joy. When they smile at you, hug you, express their love, it provides a sense of fulfillment that is hard to match. I can't imagine not being a father. It shows me what my parents felt for me, and what I imagine a loving God feels for each of His children. For my part, for my path, I have no doubt that this was the right choice. I give thanks every day for this blessing.

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